dobiegang posted a question yesterday about euthanasia because she will have to put her beloved pet to sleep soon and, naturally, it hurts. I was moved to tears by the wonderful responses she got and by remembering my own wonderful pets waiting at the Rainbow Bridge for me. How did YOU cope with losing a beloved pet?
Answers:
I just had to put my baby Coda down on Monday. I've had her since 1993. Red nose pit, Boxer %26 Lab mix female.
This wonderful dog has survived parvo and a car accident that caused her to loose a front leg. She would talk to anyone who cared to listen and we would have a 5 minute conversation every night when I came home from work (yes, she really did talk, I couldn't understand a thing she said, but she had a lot to say).
My daughter was 5 when we got Coda so has grown up with her, and Coda was 4 when my son was born.
Unfortunately, her body wore our before her mind. Her back legs have compensated for the missing leg for so long, that they just couldn't hold her up anymore. I put off the decision for euthanasia for long enough, it had to happen. My baby was in a lot of pain and I had to put her health above my selfishness. I stayed with her, scratcher her cheeks and looked in her eyes as she went down. I cried but spoke softly to her knowing that if she knew i was upset, it would worry her. Coda went quietly and that's what made it easier, tho my heart was breaking.
This decision is never easy, and that is as it should be. The decision to euthanize should be a difficult one as lives are affected.
Your friend must come up with this herself.
You did not mention if your friend has children, but when my son was so upset, I told him that I wanted him to write me a story about him and his dog. I wanted to hear the funny stories and the little things. I took his story and put it in an album with pictures of Coda and our family and gave it back to Jacob so he won't forget her.
I'm getting her ashes back today and we will be buring her in the back yard under her tree.
get a new one ... (sorry not very simpathetic)
get a bottle of so co and drink till your warm.
Don't be there. I made that mistake for my fav Chow.
Get a boyfriend.
My only tip for anyone that has to go threw this would be to not go in the room when they do it. I had a cat baby for 20 years and we had to put her down I held her in my arms when they did it because I thought it would make it easier on her but it just made her more upset and me very upset. I will never go int he room again if I half to do that because its just to hard to deal with.
I lost my dog putting it to sleep. I thought about it a lot, then it soon wore off. I never forgot, and my dog will be in my heart forever.
I'm sorry to read that you have to do that.
I never really got over my pets, but what helped was to get a new pet right away. Maybe not before, because pets get jealous, and can feel neglected.
I grew up around animals and I have had way too many go, and it never gets easier. I would always take pictures and still do, my favorites I owuld have blown up to 8x10s and keep them on my wall. I cried a GREAT deal and spent alot of time alone. I never got a new one right away I always waited until I healed a little. I would also volunteer at the local SPCA. Time helping animals always made me feel better.
I just tried to remember that it was best for him because he was in pain and would not get any better. To prolong his life would be only to prolong to inevitable, to prolong his suffering..and it would be selfish to do so, to keep him around just so I could put off saying goodbye.
Funny, when we're talking about animals, it's the humane, and right thing to do to put them out of their suffering.
But if we're talking about a person, it's murder, no matter what the circumstances or the desires of that person.
it took me years honestly. i cried myself to sleep every night because i felt so horrible for it. i couldnt watch anything with a dog on tv. i stopped going to the animal shelter. then i slowly started looking at puppies on-line with my bf, compairing ones we liked, and when we found one, fate stepped in. we were going to go down south and get this dog cause we couldnt get one from the shelter (we both live with our moms still and THEY would have to sign the papers) but the night it we were supposed to get it i got a call saying it had been attacked by a cyote. i was so beyond crushed that i went to the local shelter just to pet the dogs and cry. sad, i know. and there they were, 7 8 weeks old puppies. and i told my mom and she felt so bad about the dog we were going to get and how sad i was that she got her for us and here we are 8 months later. i still miss my dog i had to put down, but i see traits of her in the new pup, and i know i was supposed to have this one for a reason.
I was there when they put her down. She had leukemia and nothing can be done. She was in pain and acutally it would be 12 year this Memorial Day Weekend. She did not want to let go of me, but she needed to not feel pain anymore. After that, I felt content and that she was at peace. I know this is freakie, and I still remember it to this day, that I cried myself to sleep and asked she let me know that she is okay.. that night I woke up to the bell from her collar and saw her. Which freaked me out, but I knew then that she was okay.
sPEND LESS TIME WITH IT EACH DAY. THEN YOU WON'T BE SO SAD WHEN YOU LOSE IT. OR MAKE ITS LAST MOMENTS GREAT.
I didn't cope very well at all. My girl died of a broken neck from an accident in the back yard when she collided with my male and I was devastated for weeks. Very depressed. I did make her a memory garden and planted a tree in her memory at her grave site which helped a lot but time was the only true healer for me. That was 3 years ago and I still cry when I think about her to much and I miss her still.
I have had to do that with several pets, and I have to disagree with a previous poster who said to leave the pet with the vet and not be there with it during the procedure. That's this animal's last moment on this Earth, and if it's been a good pet, then it deserves to be held and loved by it's human while it's life is being taken. To just leave the pet because you can't handle the feelings or are uncomfortable about watching it is selfish. Your face and your love are the last things that your pet should perceive. I stayed with my pets when it was their time, and yes it was very painful, but I wouldn't have been able to live with myself otherwise. It's a decision I feel very good about.
So, with that in mind, encourage this person to stay there and hold their pet during it's final moments. Not only does it give you closure, it's just simply the right thing to do in return for the love that animal gave you.
As Bev, below, says; "... it was better than always wondering if he had been frightened or alone."
Bless you.
People keep saying "don't be there when it is done". I have had to do this more than once, but the easiest was when I did go in and hold my Pekingese. Not that it was easy by any means, but at least I knew that he had not suffered. It was very peaceful and he just went to sleep in my arms. That was nearly 2 years ago, I still get weepy over losing him. But it was better than always wondering if he had been frightened or alone.
This may sound strange but in order for me to move on after putting down a beloved pet I have a burial for them and I go and visit them every chance I get to.
Hey Girl, Nice seeing you here!!! I have lost Desire's (my sick female) mate(Snoop) almost four years ago. When I lost him to cancer my heart ached %26 still does.I didn't have to put him down, I was on my way to the vet,in tears, he was in the back of my SUV %26 a friend was in the back seat to comfort him, but I didn't have to euthanize him, he passed before I got there. About six months later my daughter had a male Dobie that had to be euthanized %26 she couldn't bare to do it. Well, I couldn't bare to see him suffer so I took him to the vet. Oh the pain I felt!!! For those that says get another dog to heal your heart, that does not work!! I had %26 still have three Dobies when Snoop passed but they did not take his place. It is like having two legged children if you lose one to God the others that you have can not take the place of the one you may have lost!! I do all for my pets when they are alive as well as after their deaths. They are buried in my back yard %26 yes they even have a headstone, their names are on it, date of death %26 even a picture of a Doberman engraved on it., so I see it every time I go into my yard. To the ones that says take the pet to the vet and leave, I would NEVER turn my back on my beloved pet!! I will %26 did stay at their side till they took their last breath, even if it killed me!
It is devastating. Nothing helps as far as I'm concerned. Time is the only healer.
I have had the honor to be owned by two Dobes, both of whom had to be euthanized due to cancer. The first, Alex, stayed with me four wonderful years after the diagnosis, but I think that was in large part due to my second Dobe, Dana, entering the household. When it was time for Alex to leave, HE let me know. The night before I sent him on his journey to the Rainbow Bridge, we ate his favorite people foods, or as much as he could eat. I sat up with him all night, with his head cradled in my lap, with Dana by our side.
Unfortunately, with Dana I was not so lucky. A month after she was diagnosed with osteosarcoma, I had to make that tough decision. She was vW positive, so amputation of the affected leg was not even a consideration. The pain meds were no longer working, and she could barely walk.
I stayed with them both at the end. They were loyal and loving. In their final moments, they needed to know I was loyal to them and loved them enough to stay. Was it difficult? Absolutely! But I feel better knowing that I was there.
Today, their remains are with me, in a special place in my bedroom. They shared the bed with me at night; it is only right that they continue to be with me at night -- they are my own special guardian Doberangels.
It has been about two weeks now since we had to put our saint bernard down.
It was the hardest thing to do! The Mr. and I were there with him. I cried like a baby. I tried not to, tried to be strong and all that. Just did not happen.
Everyone misses him so bad!
Know one is ready for such a thing. It is hard for the vet and his staff! I do not think our SB felt any pain from the shot. He closed his eyes and went. I would not let the people take him in without us there with him. His real owner died last year from cancer and his last year was the best we could provide for him.
Anyhoo I do not think there is a way to get ready for such a thing!!
I remember quite clearlly when I had to make the tough decision to put down my 16 year old toy poodle, Honey. Her health had been failing for the last year and she was miserable. She had liver disease, Cushings was suspected, and could hardly walk. It was time.
I made the appointment and had 4 days with her before that day. I took off from work and spent all my time with her. I believe we can communicate with our pets on some level and I remember holding her on my lap and asking her if she was ready to go. We spent some time communing with each other and, as I asked her that question, tears were falling from my eyes. She leaned over and gently licked them away and then leaned against my heart. I felt I had my answer. She was ready.
I held her while the vet gave her the shot and she was gone in seconds. Yes, it was hard, but after 16 years of love and devotion, I owed her. I will ALWAYS be with my animals at the end. So it hurts -- so what? THEY hurt. She "went to sleep" in my arms and even my vet commented "She was SO ready to go." (I found out later, that my vet went in the back room after she left me and cried. That touched me so deeply).
Because I'm the kind of person who wants to always have a dog (or two) in my life and I don't need a "time out" in between, I told my vet to be on the lookout for a dog who needed me. Four days later, my first Cocker Spaniel came into my life. He was a stray - about 8 years old -- and I adore him. Together, he and I adopted another Cocker Spaniel to keep him company.
When it's time for them to die, I will be with them, holding them and doing what I did with Honey. The last thing she heard and felt was my kiss on her nose and my whispered "I love you."
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